Nidoran and the Nido- Evolution Lines

Since the creation of gen’ration two

The two sexes have been part of the game

But there was none in Poke-Red and Blue

So all the creatures’ genders are the same.


However, there is one rule exception.

A creature with forms both female and male

And Nidoran’s is that strange Pokemon.

But once evolved they tell their own new tale.


First, Nidoran female becomes a queen

Who’s head to toe in scales- she’s armor clad.

And male becomes a king who’s strong and mean

And snaps trees like a toothpick (what a lad)!



‘Twas Pokemon’s first step sex var’yation.

It shone even in the first generation.

Sandshrew, Sandslash

Okay, so did you ever want a mouse

But he was large and burrowed underground.

He’d be a roly-poly in your house,

And he has super spiny scale all ‘round.


When he is small he’ll use powers of dirt

And when he’s big he’ll slash with his sharp claws.

Together, the two mice bring lots of hurt

With pointy fingernails and chubby paws.


And if you go on trips or just vacate

Right to a frosty Alolan resort

You’d see a steel and ice type- such a great

Roly-poly Pokemon who’s short.


So in a place that’s tropical and hot

The sandy bois get cold an awful lot.

Pichu, Pikachu, Raichu

Okay, I understand that technically

The first gen is not home to young Pichu.

But ‘cause he’s in one evolution tree

It doesn’t matter that he’s from Gen 2.


Now, Pikachu, most famous of them all.

Known even by those who say “Pokee-man”.

An icon, with a very famous call.

He might be mascot of all of  Japan.


These Pokemon are quick and strong and cute.

One saved Ash Ketchum from a Spearow storm.

There’s baby Pichu, and Raichu’s a brute.


He even has his own Alolan form.


And though appearances may bring you doubts

Pikachu is an electric mouse.


Ekans, Arbok

Ekans is a silly purple snake.

I feel his mere existence is a joke.

He’s underrated- and that makes me ache.

He’ll wrap around your neck ‘till you machoke.


Now, snake is also his name in reverse.

But what specific snake could Ekans be?

Arbok reversed is Kobra, but that’s worse

For Cobra is supposed to start with ‘C’.


The patterns Arbok wears resemble that

Of yellow monst’rous eyes of such a beast

It will transfix his prey: a mouse or rat

Then Arbok can engage in rodent feast.


Although they are regarded as real ick,

These poison snakes are really pretty sick.

Spearow, Fearow

When young Ash Ketchum first began his quest

He had some trouble training Pikachu.

In order to become the very best

He knew exactly what he had to do.


Without the help of his electric mouse

He had to weaken ‘mons all on his own.

He threw a rock- and then things headed south.

A flock of Spearow angered by the stone.


They all emerged and then began to chase

And if not for his mouse, Ash would have died.

For Spearow are a mighty, scary race

And once a Fearow, great power’s inside.


These two Pokémon, I’m sure you’ve inferred

Compared to Pidgey, they’re the greater bird.

Rattata, Raticate

Rattatatatatatatatata

How do you pronounce this Pokémon’s name?

The name of such a creature who ‘fi saw

I’d capture it and train it ‘till it’s tame.


If you have read the sonnet which talks ‘bout

How I think Pidgey’s just a normal bird

“Well Rattata is just a rat”, you’ll shout.

But he is more than that, you’ll be assured.


He’s purple and is shaped creatively

And Raticate has pretty high attack

And hyper fang can help catch a shiny

And you can count this guy has got your back.


But the pronunciation still brings awe…

Is it Rattata or else Rattata?

Pidgey, Pidgeotto, Pidgeot

This Pokémon is just a fucking bird.

And all its moves are things real birds can do.

‘Cause seriously, who has ever heard

Of people who like Pidgey? Very few.


In such a giant world of fantasy

With eight-hundred or more creatures to choose

What sort of idiotic, bland dummy

Would see a bird and say “That’s what I’ll use!”


Now to be fair, more credit is deserved.

These Pokémon are loyal with quick wit.

But I repeat: IT’S JUST A FUCKING BIRD.

Gen 5’s ran out of ideas? Not this shit?


I guess Pidove is just a bird as well

But Unfezant’s feathers look sick as hell.

Sorry for the fowler language in this one.

Weedle, Kakuna, Beedrill

If Caterpie’s a bug that’s not for you

Then take a look at this small hairy thing.

The pointy point, some people say it’s true

That Weedle uses it for poison sting.


The second stage: Kakuna’s not a fool.

He has a sharper point than Metapod.

He also is more edgy and more cool.

And he has such a scaly, rocking bod.


At last the final stage is dear Beedrill.

An awesome Jerry Seinfeld Poké-guy.

He jabs his stinger in and gets the kill.

His mega evolution is real fly.


A super pointy trio are these bugs.

I’d hate to find them living ‘neath my rugs.

Caterpie, Metapod, Butterfree

At last, you’ve chose your partner- off you go!

It’s time to leave your former life behind

And as you search the forests of Kanto

Here is a line of beasts that you could find:


A line of bugs (whose names are up above)

A caterpillar and a butterfly

But how come Metapod receives no love?

‘Cause he is a hardn’ing green-blob guy.


Fair Metapod is popular online

For he, they say, is a far beyond compare

Male genitals reflect in its design

And that I’m sure Gamefreak was not aware.


And trainers, when your friend reaches stage three,

If he shall meet a pink girl, set him free.

Squirtle, Wartortle, Blastoise

The final creature left up to your choice

Is Squirtle, who’s a turtle colored blue.

With such a final stage, like great Blastoise

This Pokémon might be the one for you.


Its final stage has cannons on its back

That blast huge jets of water at its foes

And Charmander and Bulbasaur both lack

A sunglass-sporting squad of Squirtle bros.


Though Charmander wins popularity,

Compared to Squirtle, everyone is trash

The other two, they must evolve, you see

In order to appear in Super Smash.


But here’s one thing to make him seem less woke:

He was chosen by Gary f*cking Oak.